总是会记起边开车边哭泣的你,对感情失望转而寻欢作乐的你,对世事看透谈笑风生的你。永远都是我的心头好。
嗓子痛到死,被roommates在睡梦中呼唤名字然后醒来就再也睡不着。
本来心情就憋着。
打开iTunes就随便放到了<雨季>…然后那些在北京流汗、挤地铁、欢聚、喝醉、咒骂、烦躁、快乐的日子。如今你即将离去,重新加入这场繁盛的冒险。我前途未卜,生死未知,只是那种另一个back-up和my person又即将离去的无力感又多了一筹。好像就真的要变成形单影只的奋斗了。
我总是这般自己徒增伤感。
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今天见到你很开心。没有任何多余的情绪和心思。只是我大概太会演戏,将其变为一出典型的理所当然的尴尬戏。
I don’t want to admit but I don’t have anyone who can even give me a hug when I’m drunk alone in a bar like Kepner. It’s not sad. It’s just helpless.
要的其实很简单,但是也都没有。
不落入極端是最高的戒律。既不做吸煙者,也不做驕傲的不吸煙者;不做說謊者,也不做極其傲慢的不說謊者。極端的守戒,只讓驕傲膨脹。以自己守戒為榮的佛教徒,表現出屈就他人,炫耀自己的戒律,讓那沒守戒或守了一點的人難堪,這種佛教徒需要讀《金剛經》。— 宗薩欽哲仁波切
A NYC Taxi driver wrote:
I arrived at the address and honked the horn. After waiting a few minutes I honked again. Since this was going to be my last ride of my shift I thought about just driving away, but instead I put the car in park and walked up to the door and knocked.. ‘Just a minute’, answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor.
After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 90’s stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940’s movie.
By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets.
There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard
box filled with photos and glassware.
‘Would you carry my bag out to the car?’ she said. I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman.
She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb.
She kept thanking me for my kindness. ‘It’s nothing’, I told her.. ‘I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother to be treated.’
‘Oh, you’re such a good boy, she said. When we got in the cab, she gave me an address and then asked, ‘Could you drive
through downtown?’
‘It’s not the shortest way,’ I answered quickly..
‘Oh, I don’t mind,’ she said. ‘I’m in no hurry. I’m on my way to a hospice.
I looked in the rear-view mirror. Her eyes were glistening. ‘I don’t have any family left,’ she continued in a soft voice..’The doctor says I don’t have very long.’ I quietly reached over and shut off the meter.
‘What route would you like me to take?’ I asked.
For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator.
We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl.
Sometimes she’d ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.
As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, ‘I’m tired.Let’s go now’.
We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico.
Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move.
They must have been expecting her.
I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair.
‘How much do I owe you?’ She asked, reaching into her purse.
‘Nothing,’ I said
‘You have to make a living,’ she answered.
‘There are other passengers,’ I responded.
Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug.She held onto me tightly.
‘You gave an old woman a little moment of joy,’ she said. ‘Thank you.’
I squeezed her hand, and then walked into the dim morning light.. Behind me, a door shut.It was the sound of the closing of a life..
I didn’t pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly lost in thought. For the rest of that day,I could hardly talk.What if that woman had gotten an angry driver,or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away?
On a quick review, I don’t think that I have done anything more important in my life.
(Source: mishalmoorebloggyblog, via devonsjournal)
Yes the truth is definitely that we have so many choices but not necessarily and not possibly each of us can be with one another. For myself, the important next step logically should be: so it doesn’t mean pure sex could be the substitute for the-bark-not-the-bite intimacy. Such illusion makes you horny, embarrassed and ridiculous.
More significantly, it breaks the balance of social interaction. The natural flow and distribution of encompassment and encounter are disrupted and become concentrated abnormally in some period. Consequently, you have to deal with the loneliness on the idyllic or raining days remaining.
Don’t be a kid, be abstinent.
世上最无能为力的事情大概也只是有意和无情了。
只是无论有情无情,那些爱你就像爱生命的勇气,伟大和细致怕是很难寻到真迹了。你更爱自己了,也就不太去在乎周遭了。所以再出色的外表也没有显得有任何特别。还是自顾吃饱来的实在。
